The Busy Pagan

I know I keep lagging behind on the 44 DOW, but there has been, as usual, so much crap going on you wouldn't believe it.  House-hunting right now?  Ugh.  But something good will come our way.  I'm sure of it.

Anywho, getting on with it, the topic for day 4 is to post a picture of something in Nature.  The focus is to have the focus as being on the element of Water (anyone feel like giving me a resounding "Duuuuuuuh" yet? XD)

Water is my most favorite element.  I may be an air/earth sign (I'm on a cusp) but I'm a hardcore water baby.  I love rivers, lakes, and the ocean.  Especially the ocean.

Lakes, for me, are a blessed oasis.  They're not the ocean, but they're their own brand of sea-like solitude.  A lake nestled against a backdrop of mountains and as many spring-time wildflowers as you could ever hope to see interspersed with the green of lush grasses is one of my ideas of paradise.

I haven't yet gotten into the swing of things to make sure that I make these posts every day, but at least I haven't given up on it or totally flaked out, which I see to be a good thing.  Ergo, I'm not beating myself up overly much.

Today's topic is, as the title suggests, about the athame.  Unless someone is an uber beginner, just about every Pagan knows what an athame is and, typically, what purpose it serves.  But, just in case I've got someone (perchance) reading that doesn't know I'll give the abbreviated skinny.

An athame is a ritual knife used in ritual (I know; that was a little redundant).  One of the things the athame symbolizes in ritual is the masculine energies.  For instance, in fertility rituals, the athame's blade gets dipped into a chalice of wine (the chalice representing the feminine energies, of course) to symbolize the unity of the masculine and the feminine to bring forth life. Another use that the athame can have in ritual is during the casting of circle.  I've also seen athames used to draw invoking and evoking pentagrams in the air as a solute to the gods.

Traditionally it's a double-edged blade with a black wooden handle and is not meant for any sort of physical cutting (though some that I know of occasionally use the blade of their athame to let a little of their own blood if the spell calls for it; that just boils down to personal choice). The knife typically used for any sort of cutting (which typically ranges only to herbs) is called a boline, which traditionally carries a crescent-shaped single-edged blade like a small harvesting sickle.

Nowadays, many have opted to acquire athames that stray away from tradition.  My first athame was a small boot knife-styled blade, double-edged, and made from either silver or stainless steel (I can't remember which). Due to the fact that I had some bad memories tied to that athame, I chose to sell it to someone who could find better use from it.

As for what I'm hoping to get for my next athame?  I dunno, honestly.  I'm just going to wait until the right one presents itself to me.  I like daggers that look like miniature swords.  I like the idea of having an athame with a wooden handle, double-edged blade, and overall, I'd just like it to be something simplistic.  I don't need anything gaudy or overly ornate.

I'd love it if I could find an athame with the Triple Moon symbol on the handle.  I've seen a few of those.  The Triple Moon symbol or the Goddess symbol on the handle would be perfect for me  ^_^

I don't know if this would be a shocking thing for a Pagan to say, but I don't really know that many myths.  I mean, I have studied about a few different Pantheons ranging from the Egyptians to the Greeks and now to the Celts.  But maybe I don't necessarily look at those stories as being myths.  Even if they're like "The Iliad" where it could basically be bits of legend coupled with truth of actual events, I still see them as having at least some truth to them.  And if they don't, they're still wonderful, exciting stories.

I mean, come on, hearing about Zeus giving birth to Athena from his head?  That sounds pretty fantastical but also, to me, kinda funny.  If I recall correctly, Zeus felt threatened by what Athena was meant to do, so as soon as she was birthed from her mother, Zeus ate her.  But soon after consuming his daughter, he got such a headache that he called upon Hephaestus, the Olympian gods' smithcraft, to split open Zeus' head and out popped Athena -- fully-formed into adulthood and already clothed for battle.  One story in particular that I got a kick out of was how one of the gods played a prank on Zeus and basically made it to where Zeus copulated with a goat, which he doesn't realize until later.  Of course, the prank had rather disastrous results. The prank was spawned because Ol' Thunderbutt is a bit of a hardass anyway -- but the prankster, having already known that, should have realized that the humorless king of the Olympians would not have found it funny and, instead, would have sought vengeance for his humiliation.  If I'm not mistaken, that was how the Oneroi came to be, but don't quote me.  I just remember that it was an Oneroi who was involved.

However, before I really ever started to learn of these stories of the gods, there is one story from folklore that I have always rather cherished even as it is a really sad story.  As it stands, I saw the movie first and, currently, I am FINALLY able to read the book (LOVING it, btw; Since last night and much of my time today I have already read over 200 pages out of the 900 that are listed).

Some stories portray Morgan Le Fay as an evil woman, a sorceress probably about the same ilk as Lilith is portrayed.  But historians of men are rarely kind to strong women, especially when those chauvinists have the power of the early Christian cloth to make their false words into something for all fearful people to be obeyed and accepted blindly as truth.

The book and movie that I am speaking of, of course, would be "The Mists of Avalon" by Marion Zimmer Bradley.  And, naturally, I love the decidedly Pagan theme of the book.  I appreciated the amount of research that Marion did in creating this story and I was thrilled to see how many Pagans she consulted so as to have as correct a perspective on the Pagan rites back in those days. People like Isaac Bonewits, Morning-Glory Zell, and even Starhawk's book "The Spiral Dance" were mentioned.  Perhaps it's silly that seeing them mentioned should make me so giddy, but knowing how much she researched Paganism for this book made me appreciate it even more.  It's almost like reading a truly Pagan novel.

Anyway, getting back to the point.  Stories like this are what I like to hear in regards to Morgaine Le Fay.  Even the few things I was able to find about her on the internet seem to reflect that she was actually a kind woman seeking to do the work of the Goddess, not some evil sorceress out to bring about the downfall of King Arthur and Camelot or Merlin.

I think my favorite part of the book and the movie is when it talks about how she was raised.  I particularly appreciated this part of the movie as it shows Morgaine growing up in training to be a priestess, learning magick, herb lore (I especially loved that brief glimpse of the kitchen area that showed all the herbs being hung for drying), and, of course, passing the test to part the mists.

As much as I love this story, it's also quite saddening to see how wrong all their lives went.  As much as I love this story, to me it shows an example of what happens when one manipulates others as Viviane, the Lady of the Lake, had done.  Oh, I know it was to try to ensure a good future for Avalon and Britain, but I think all her meddling (like how Igraine came to be with Uther, causing Morgaine to unwittingly lie with her little brother for the Great Rite of Beltane, etc) caused a great deal of harm even despite her best intentions.  As it is said,  "The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

Still, through it all, I can see how Viviane tried her best, loved the Goddess and loved her family.  Both she and Morgaine were the biggest reasons that I love this story.  Their lives aren't easy, but they learn and try to make the best out of their situations.

That's what I take from it anyway.

Like many Pagans in my acquaintance, I was raised in a Christian household. "The Wizard of Oz", "Bedknobs and Broomsticks", and "Bewitched" were perfectly acceptable, but "Harry Potter" was of the devil. I went to a Bible college after high school that turned out to be a less-than-pleasant experience. Those nearly-two years were what made me decide that I'd had enough of so-called "Christians" that act nothing like the Christ. I'd seen people start at that school behaving very kindly for the most part but then turn into horrid, judgmental jerks as time went on. There was this one dude named Sam who seemed to think that it was so holy to tell my roommate (I'll just refer to her as R) that a friend of hers who had committed suicide had gone to hell. Yes, asshat, Comfort one another with those words. I'd wanted to punch him because his torrid insistence very greatly upset R and it's not even a belief I've ever been able to subscribe to.
There was this other gal who had started out one of my most favorite people there (I'll refer to her as J). She used to be so nice to me and she was a very happy, bouncy, and hyper person. I used to love being around her. But as time went on, hers was the change that was the most horrible. She became someone who was so uptight, stick up her ass, judgmental, and haughty. At one point during the second year I was having to deal with a very bad sickness. It was like the cold that wouldn't go away. I'd feel the cold coming on, I'd get full-blown sick for a couple weeks, finally get better and be fine for about a week and then it would start all over again. It was an absolutely MISERABLE few months. Well, one afternoon a bunch of us had congregated at my former roommate's apartment for a study group. I looked at R and told her that I could feel this sickness coming back on me.
Well, despite the fact that it was a private conversation, J apparently overheard me and butted her oh-so-holy nose in to tell me in a very snotty, hoity-toity voice, "Well, quit calling it on yourself!"
-_- Gee. Thanks, bitch. I was SO comforted and that was UBER helpful.
Even now, all these years later, that shit still burns quite honestly. J is one of the main reasons why I don't label myself a Christian anymore. Even as a Pagan, I look at God the same as I did when I was a Christian, I still believe in Christ, but it's like that bumper sticker: "I'm fine with God; it's His fan-club I can't stand."
Hell, Gandhi couldn't have put it any better when he said "I like your Christ, I just don't like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ."
Aaaaaaanywho, getting past the bitter stuff, a few months after I left the school I was in a store not far from where I lived and I stumbled across a book. It was a spell book specifically for helping someone in regards to sleeping and dreams. I remember feeling a curious surprise as I paged through the book. None of the magick that I saw in there had anything to do with trying to cause someone else harm, killing cats for Halloween, or eating children. Nothing in there about hexes or curses. Oh, I wasn't dumb enough to think that stuff like that didn't happen, but this was a stark contrast to what I'd always been brought up to believe about witchcraft.
That piqued my interest for sure.
At first I had no idea what to start reading to learn more, but I eventually was introduced to Silver Ravenwolf's books. And, while I know that her books tend to be very controversial, she was still a good start for me. She cleared up a lot of the questions and misgivings I initially had and enabled me to get my foot in the door to learn more progressively. However, my very most favorite Pagan author is Ellen Dugan. Her book Elements of Witchcraft: Natural Magick for Teens was the first book of hers that I ever read and, even though I wasn't a teenager when I first read it, I found it to be a delightful book for any beginner to read no matter what the age range.
There are several authors I enjoy reading, though (as previously mentioned), I'm not exactly practiced yet. Practice-wise, I'm still a newbie. Between my own lack of self-discipline to keep at trying to practice along with life situations that have prevented it from being a possibility? Yeah. I've still got a long way to go.
Druid has been trying to help me progress. He's got a copy of The Complete Book of Witchcraft by Raymond Buckland (or Uncle Bucky as we jokingly refer to him as) and I've got the first book in the WitchSchool.com series that I've been wanting to go through (and I very much enjoy listening to the "Pagans Tonight!" radio show that's put on by the WitchSchool crew). But, like I said, life has not exactly seen us in situations where we really could work on it more.

 
One thing I'm very much wanting to focus on is also raising our children in Paganism. I grew up in Christianity and that was about as easy as going to church every Sunday, reading the Bible and the occasional devotional, etc. Really, there wasn't much to it and, of course, the materials for Christian parenting abound. Pagan Parenting, on the other hand, is not as prevalent. There aren't very many books geared toward Pagan children or, even, Pagan Parenting.
So, bearing that in mind, I have been badly wanting to find a family-oriented coven to be a part of. I'd tried that at the last place I'd lived and…..it didn't go so well. They seemed like really nice, welcoming people. We got to enjoy two Sabbats with them (Beltane and Midsummer) and then after that we basically got shunned because, as they so put it, "We have two coven members who work at DHS and they could be fired if they were found to be socializing with DHS clients outside of work," the aforementioned DHS clients being us of course. I'd written about that on my Pagan Mommy blog and the people who commented as well as Druid all thought that that was a bunch of hooey. But what could we do? *shrug* As much as it hurt back then, I'm over it at this point and hoping that we can find a coven to belong to here.
One of the big disappointments about that coven not working out was because the kids and done so well at the rituals! I was thrilled enough for myself to be able to take part, but my biggest happiness and pride came from watching my children participate. Aspen, my oldest, got to have a big part of the Midsummer ritual (he got to represent the element of Earth and be the Gnome for the ritual) and he did so good with it, I almost cried! I wanted to be part of that not only for my own learning but also for the kids. That coven placed a big emphasis on including children in ritual that I really thought that it would have been a good fit for us. But considering the way that life went down several months later, I suppose it was for the best that we ultimately were not welcomed into the group. Our abrupt departure would have been quite disruptive to the balance and they didn't need that.
So I am hoping to be able to find a coven here that we can join. I think it would not only be a huge help for me in becoming more practiced but also to help me to learn how to raise my children in the Craft. They really enjoyed the Sabbat rituals and I think it was beneficial to them to get to be around other children being raised in Paganism as well.
In the meantime, Druid and I will have to just figure it out by ourselves. I know he knows more about Pagan Parenting than I do, but having other people to be around would just be incredibly helpful.

 
Well, I suppose that wraps up this first entry for the 44 Days of Witchery challenge. I'm really hoping to do better at keeping up with it than I did at my last attempt of it.

1. What’s your witchy background? 
2. A myth or story from folklore. 
3. Witchy tools: athame.
4. Picture of nature (water element).
5. A favourite Goddess. 
6. A favourite God. 
7. Air element.
8. A photo of a magical place outdoors. 
9. A favourite mythological animal.
10. Your sun sign.
11. Witchy tools: oils.
12. Picture of nature (air element).
13. What are some of the witchy books that influenced you?
14. A favourite pagan holiday that you celebrate. 
15. Thoughts on the afterlife?
16. Favourite witchy website(s).
17. Picture of nature (fire element).
18. Have you had any paranormal experiences?
19. Fire element.
20. A picture of a tarot or oracle card, and its meaning. 
21. A favourite scent.
22. Current moon phase.
23. A favourite candle.
24. Your moon sign.
25. How do your close ones feel about your witchy path? Do they know? Why or why not? 
26. A witchy podcast.
27. Picture of nature (earth element).
28. A picture of a witchy I-Want-It-Now!
29. Water element.
30. Witchy tools: wand.
31. A favourite pagan/witchy movie.
32. A pagan/witchy artwork. 
33. Faerie of your choice.
34. Rune of your choice.
35. Something that I think people who don’t know much about paganism/witchcraft should know. 
36. Flower of your choice, and its magical properties.
37. A famous pagan/witch!
38. Witchy tools: cauldron.
39. Something that inspires you.
40. Your altar, if you have one!
41. A spell you’ve done.
42. A favourite nature spirit.
43. A magical recipe.
44. Witch’s choice!

On my last blog I had started the "44 Days of Witchery Challenge" as posted by The Domestic Pagan, but I never really got to finish it.  So, in addition to the Pagan Blog Project, I'm going to make another attempt at the 44 Days of Witchery again.

I'm also going to be doing posts for the first 3 topics for the Pagan Blog Project.  It's too late to submit them for the blog roll, but at least I'll have them done.  ^_^